December 2009
39 posts
tonight i broke down
after a good night. something triggered me and stabbed me in the back. tears falling as im driving, feeling like i have no control of me right now. then i saw him, drive right by me, we were stopped at a light. i saw him and her at the corner of my eye…i made a right turn off of the street and couldnt stop crying. i had to stop. i sat outside my dads shop just sitting there, trying to...
“What makes life worth living is knowing that one day you’ll wake up and...”
recently,
not too many things have been going right. i havent been eating normally. ive been moping around wishing everything would get better, but then it gets worse.
this winter break was supposed to be filled with fun, excitement and relaxation. i was sick the first week of it, fun things here and there but not enough, not too much excitement, and the relaxing hasnt worked out too much. im sick of not...
SO IT GOES.
Listen
seeing you with her
makes me quench. it makes me remember how it was when i was with you. hearing certain songs make me remember us. But after everything ive ever been through with guys, it ends the same way. They end up being the happy ones and im left out in the dust. its not fare at all.
“It alwats rains the hardest on the ones that deserve the sun.”
love. love. love.
“get born, grow up, discover the world, discover yourself.”
christmas is supposed to be about the birth of jesus. not about who got the best presents. i know for sure i didnt, but my parents tried.
now the best part about christmas….lowestpricetrafficschool.com!
great great song<3
“Everybody has difficult years, but a lot of times the difficult years end up...”
– Brittany Murphy
“All this time I was wasting, hoping you would come around…you’re not...”
– Taylor Swift
Gravity- Sara Bareilles
life was getting better, until he came around. then it was getting better than before, then it all dropped like a bomb. listening to one sentence, looking at one statement changed me. im not as happy anymore. and it is all his fault. im trying to be strong, i really am. it always rains the hardest, on the ones that deserve the sun the most.
he is right.
a guy told me today something that made alot of sense. when one person doesnt like the other anymore, you have to cut off all sources of talking. that way those feelings can be gone, and then it will be easier later to be friends again. you cant do it right away because those feelings will come back for one of you and then that friendship is impossible. im not gonna talk to the boy i liked because...
this is not good. i drove by your house tonight to see your christmas lights since you said i could and i really wanted to park in the driveway and walk in insted of just driving by. crying on the way home while very tired isnt good while driving. i hate this, and you are not going through anything like i am.
when I saw you the other day
I was shakey, nervous, shocked, scared and happy. I don’t know why I was like that. I guess because I think because of what happened with us, would make us awkward. Then you came to my show to support me. I wish you would understand how much it ment to me for you to come, but I could see you in the crowd not really watching. I guess it wasn’t your thing. When I saw you there watching...
Listen
I wish you would realize
what i am going through right now. It is so hard. You are always in my mind, I have dreams about you coming back to me saying that everything will be okay! I want everything to be great with us. You told me you want to be friends still, but you defiently arent showing it. I miss you, I hope you feel the same.
the chill in the air
tells me its time to snuggle, and right now all i want to do is cry in his arms. too bad he’s not there for me anymore.
boys
are stupid, idiotic, annoying, dumb, umsympathetic, dicks, jerks, skumbags, heart breakers, dipshits, fuckers, but they can make us girls feel good when they want something out of it. gahhhh, i dont understand. can’t there be someone decent for all of us out of how many people there are living on this earth?
I hate that
I don’t have a Christmas tree to decorate this year. Gotta love my life.
runaway
with me. we can be free and just go everywhere together.
whos down?